“Those are the times that are more unique…”

5 Toughest trucks ever

Lets get some things clear, these trucks are not for you if you currently own a RAV-4. These trucks are smelly, slow, uncomfortable, and dont turn or stop well. If you need to pull a tree stump out of the ground, better find one of these. Although most people buy SUVs because it makes their kids safe, you should be terrified if your kid is in one of these.

A list of the 5 toughest trucks ever made:

5. Ford Bronco (until 1977):

Why: In 5th place because it was late to the party. The engine was derived from the Ford Falcon’s (an economy car), so it has a bit more car in it’s DNA than I would like. I also think they are more expensive than they should be. Next!

4. Toyota FJ40:

Why: Basically Toyota’s version of the CJ. Flame wars between the two trucks has been going on for decades, and will continue long after I’m done on this planet. General consensus is that these trucks are a bit more durable than the CJ, but harder and more expensive to fix when something breaks. In the US, at least, FJs are more expensive than CJs because they are much less common. Although both the CJ anf FJ are very similar, I rank the CJ higher, because you can probably find one for sale down the block.

Do NOT confuse this with the current Toyota FJ, which is made for taking kids to soccer games.

3. Jeep CJ:

Why: The CJ is the “civilian Jeep” version of the truck that won World War 2. Its early incarnations are almost exactly the same as the original military design. During the war, they were used to hunt people, after the war, to hunt deer. They are found all over the world, are dirt cheap, and you can fix anything with parts you can find anywhere. Cheap. In a few minutes. With a rock.

Not to be confused with the less cool Jeep YJ (Wrangler)

2. Land Rover Defender:

Why: Defenders have been in production since 1948, and have always had legendary durability. The inside of the truck is entirely spartan; air and water leak in from all gaps, the seats have almost no padding, and good luck if you are in a jump seat. Heat and/or air conditioning (if you are lucky) barely work. Regardless, you can use this truck to put out fires, fight wars, or grow corn. Rover also goes to great pains to make parts interchangable from most years (backwards and forwards), so much so that the president of Land Rover recently claimed that above 70% of the defenders ever built are still in use. Although that may be true, only god knows where he got that number from. This is also the only truck on the list still in production.

1. International Scout:

Why: Arugably the first SUV, the Scout was designed to “replace the horse” by International Harvester (which built farm equipment and commercial trucks) as a competitor to the Jeep CJ. The initial versions of these trucks didn’t even have roll down windows, they just slid sideways. The 8-cyldiner engines are indestructible (the 345 was originally used in school buses and delivery trucks) and Scouts equipped with them were favored transportation for elite units in the Vietnam war, even if the truck seemed dated otherwise at the time. They never overheated, going up hill in 115+ degree weather with no problem. If you look at the radiator, you’ll understand why.

Unlike the Defender, these are dirt cheap to buy. It doesn’t matter how bad the condition of the truck is, it’ll probably run forever as long as you don’t pour gravel into the cylinders. The best part? Styling. There is none.

Update: Super Scout Specilaist is a great source of info.

Update: Just found Hemmings has a very similar article, worth reading.

dude, i totally miss you

you know when you sleep at a weird time of day and when you wake up, you cant feel what time it is and your days start to run together, and Friday feels like Thursday, and when Saturday rolls around you get confused by what’s on TV because you expected Friday’s line-up, and you feel like you took some bad drugs, and you want to run and sleep at the same time, and you’re slightly irritable, and you have a bad, loose shit that burns a little and you can’t wipe it properly because even when you think you’re done shitting, there’s a small liquid flow of fecal juice innocently and inconspicuously dribbling off your O-ring making your asshole itch and forcing you to re-wipe, all because your digestion system is fucked up from one misplaced nap you took days ago?

that’s what your absence is like.

all my posts start to run together, and Friday’s post feels like Thursday’s post, and when Saturday rolls around I get confused about what to post because I expected to post Friday’s post, and I feel like I took some bad drugs, and I want to post and wait at the same time, and I’m slightly irritable, and I have bad, loose shits that burn quite a bit and I can’t wipe properly because even when I’m done shitting, there’s still some shit in my pants from when I innocently and inconspicuously shit my pants which now mash more shit into my O-ring making my asshole shitty and forcing me to flagellate the shame away, all because some fucked-up Palestinian taint-sniffer stole your laptop weeks ago.

dude, i totally miss you


I prefer a light balsamic vinaigrette

“I Prefer Syrup!”